...after months of research and detailed analysis I have come to a very astounding conclusion

...Marie is a dunda head. (This picture is of my nephews Jake, Bobitu and Isaiah)

Back from Canada

Aw, it was so sweet and me and Marie had the best time ever. I had to of course guide her around and explain a few key landmarks - those furry brown things with bushy tails are called beavers, those big fat clumsy beasts are moose (must be related to the chipmunk), and of course just the basics like toonies and lonnies, good looking guys (this is where 98% of them come from) and great woman hockey players.

All in all it was a most enlightening trip for her and no doubt was a major turning point in her life.

Schools out....

Well, all of the college students have gone home for the summer so it is pretty lonely here on the GBS campus. However, we have been entertaining ourselves by hiding in trees and throwing acorns at the poor students who were left behind and have to take care of the lawns around campus. It is so nice to have all the humans working for us!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY CAMBRIAN!

Today is Cambrian's birthday... he's getting pretty old. Yeah, that's pretty much all there is to say about it. :) Congrats on living so long Cambrian!

A Tribute To Moms

Sorry we didn't have this up sooner (like maybe for Mother's Day) but, living in the woods and all, internet connection can be terrible sometimes.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RxT5NwQUtVM

Cambrian and Marie's New Ride

Yeah, we got tired of jumping from tree to tree so we decided to upgrade. Of course this has now made us extremely popular with all the other neighbourhood squirrels so we have to resort to living in fenced housing (Note barbed wire fence in background).

YouTube - Broadcast Yourself.

YouTube - Broadcast Yourself.

Out...again

On this saddened night tears will no doubt fill the eyes of many a Canadian as Canada's last hope of a Stanley Cup champion vanishes with the defeat of Montreal (A 4-1 series defeat to Philadelphia). So it is deep sorrow and great agony that I, Cambrian, report to you that the last Canadian team to win a Stanley Cup championship dates back to 1993 (the longest drought for a Canadian team in NHL history).

Farewell till next year everybody.

The New Look

I decided to try something different due to the fact that it would seem Cambrian fell off the face of this planet. Since he won't pay attention to HIS blog I decided to do just a couple little things to see if he will even notice. Which I'm sure he won't (he is quite good at not recognizing things and even better at not paying attention or not listening) Anyway, hope you enjoy the new look and maybe there will be some interesting posts in the future... like maybe a big feud or something.

I hate blogging...

... so I'll just post pictures!

Cambrian informed me that I can not leave this computer or do anything else until I post. So, since I am so obedient, I will try to make this as painless as possible for both me and the ones who will read this...

This sign was found in Canada. (As you can see, they are very intelligent up there)

A picture taken while I was driving. (see if you can figure that one out)

Another sign found in Canada. Genius!

AND FINALLY...

The motto of our blog

Dedication right here...

For those of you dimwits who have yet to hear, the mayor of Montreal has issued a warning to the city fire stations that have done what he has called "an act of vandalism." What did these fire stations do to invoke such a stir? They painted their fire stations red, white, and blue to match the colours of the local hockey team (which happen to the be the FIRST PLACE Montreal Canadiens who are going all the way to the Stanley Cup finals! - being a highly renowned news source, the SE shows no bias or partiality to any particular NHL organization or franchise and is not responsible for any feelings of anger, rage, or anxiety that may occur to our viewers). As a result the mayor has issued as statement resenting this brave act of patriotism and has ordered a city paint scraping crew to erase all paint and "graffiti" off all local fire stations and will bill the fire company for the charges.
"I have Habs fever, but I don't put graffiti or paint in the windows of my house," he told reporters Thursday while announcing new initiatives to fight graffiti."
Hm, some people have no sense of humour. (NOTE: He must be a separatist)

We got a bid!!!

So far we're up to $33 on the red and $26 on the black.
Yeah, its a pretty big day for both of us.

Me and Marie's First e-bay sale!

Yes, we are both very excited. I should note that we have yet to receive any bids on any of the three items but we look for that to change any day soon.

No doubt these jerseys will go for well over a $100 a piece and then we will go on a well deserved vacation to Honolulu.

Even the Dean of Men...

Wow, even the Dean of Men looks at our site. Hm, small world. This rather "incriminating" photo taken by me and cousin Arther last evening gives all of you out there in GBS a real inside look into the life of Mr. Pee. (Or Mr. Pea - I'm not quite sure which one he would prefer)
Contrary to popular opinion, dean staff and faculty really do very little to keep this fine school running. Mostly they just play around on the computer all day (Minesweeper is the favorite).
As you can see, his son will soon be close behind him in his footsteps.

Espionage Results Part I

This picture was taken by Marie from the 2nd floor of the Byer house and was immediately sent to the GBS Mountie Administration (GMA). You will note that they are breaking the six-inch role and that probably won't bode well on their portfolio.
I would like to note that Marie and I have many incriminating photos of this sort as we followed Ezra and Allison around all evening in Marie's red mini cooper (its quite inconspicuous).
Note to other couples contemplating breaking the six-inch rule: we will be after you next!

It's Official - Humans are becoming more and more like squirrels every day

Check out this picture that Marie showed me off of Yahoo news. If you'll look closely you'll notice the gray in this man's hair. You know, it has always been thought that the monkey was the popular origin for the human species but I might suggest that squirrels may play a bigger role in this area then they have been given credit (this is confirmed by the squirrels obvious dominance).

Off to Denmark

Marie's brother Harvey (the one in the picture) is off to Denmark to back up Canadian forces in their bid to maintain rights to the Baffin Islands. Those evil Denmarkians have been up to their evil tricks for quite some time and now it is me and Marie's hope that the Canadian army combined with Harvey's masive squirrel power will put the Canadian forces over the top of the hated Denmarkian fatheads.

Love you Harvey! (that was Marie)
Don't get shot you dope. (that was me)

I Don't Know If I'm Going To Make It (Sniffle Sniffle)

Yes, over GBS winter break I decided that I would do the charitable thing and take time to visit my little nephew Billy and Lukaida (a girl in case you were wondering). Now while I might point out that this isn't my precise definition of a "good time" it does help build character and it does my spirit good to know that I am influencing my younger generation for the better.
Of course this now leaves Marie at home by herself and she is in a advanced state of high hyperventilation 24/7. All she does is lay around and cry all day and count down the seconds till Monday return (at least this is what my best judgement tells me she is doing).

Hang in there Marie, you've only got about 4,489,434 seconds more to go :)
Don't let anyone ever tell you that there isn't a bright side in life.

Unimpo...er... Important Announcement

I'm taking Marie to the annual Squirrel Ball Banquet (In case you were wondering, yes this has something to do with putting her in the hospital for a week. Its one of those "make ammends" promises - no offense Marie). My only prayer is that it is very short and there is no dancing involved. Oh its not that I'm not an expert dancer - I am - but it is not my personal fortee (or something like that word). And besides, I like to get back in good time to play hockey with the other squirrels in the daily evening hockey game at 10:00 PM. Of course Marie will probably get very mad and throw something at me when she reads this post but what can I say? Female squirrels just expect entirerly too much out of us male squirrels and so why should we always take the brunt of their verbal yellings?

HAPPY VALENTINES DAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Probably the most important of all holidays to squirrels everywhere! Happy Valentines Day everybody!

One sick little squirrel

Poor Marie is down with severe barf syndrom. The poor little thing can barely function and is hovering in the balances of life and death (I love dramatization). If any of you would be interested in maybe offering her a donations of peasuts or sprite I'm sure she would be much appreciative.

Signed,

A very worried Cambrian

Some of us are just desperate...

I just thought yall would like a little picture of what Cambrian does with all of his spare time. Maybe it could help you appreciate his blogging a little better.

I'm such a good listener

Cambrian told me that I had to write something on this blog thingie... so, being the good little squirrel that I am I will, of course, obey him. So here's my post-

Well, since my recent "illness" i can't quite think to clearly so it would seem that I don't really have to much to say. Yep thats about it!

Reason for blogging fall-off

Marie was in the hospital with a dislocated head. (Arguments just aren't what they used to be) It started off fine of course. She said my paws had grease on them. I insisted that it was just my dark complexion. She disagreed and after a few rather adjective filled sentences proceeded to slap my nose causing an unnecessary flow of red liquid to flow down the front of my face. Being a moncho squirrel with a well kept ego I naturally did the first thing that every manly squirrel in my situation would do in order to resolve a disagreement - a quick, swift blow to her upper tailbone followed by an excessive shaking of her head, which in turn led to a week long stay in the hospital.

Me being the kind and considerate squirrel that I am, I generously offered to spend the days with her to help them pass by quicker. During that time we managed to resolve most of our differences and things seem to be heading on the up and up and so far as of last night we have yet to get in any arguments or quabbles of any kind (although I must point out that my paws never did have grease on them in the first place).

Pay Attention People!

Okay, let me break this sign down in as great a detail as I possibly can so that there will be no misinterpretation in the future! Note big squirrel on left and little baby squirrel on right. Got that? Okay, now notice bright yellow sign with the words "Squirrel Xing" on it. This too hard to remember? Okay, now that you've got this down, try to remember this last detail - When you see a sign like this it means that there are - yep, you guessed it - squirrels around! Go figure!
Now, answer me this simple question. Why did my great Uncle Mickey just get run over on one of these crossings this past week? Its because inconsiderate, dinkleheaded humans have no care about the rights of the smaller species in the world! We have the right to cross the street to you know. Show some consideration!

Viewers very divided on what they believe

Yes, it would appear from recent poll results on SE that the viewers of this highly intellectual site are rather diverse in there areas of taste. For experiment and future blog post considerations I am posting an updated poll on the right that I hope will give me (and Marie of course) a better understanding of what you the audience desires of me (er...I mean us).

Latest GBS Campus Gossip

Yes, as well as being a highly intellectual site, this blog doubles as a gossip sheet as well. Have no fear though as I assure you that this type of gossip is Biblically sound - We do not mention peoples names, photos, or Social Security numbers. Instead we dwell on the more discreet news.

For instance, my brother Benny tells me that the President of GBS (who will remain anonymous for the reasons stated above) just issued a statement this week in his caucus meeting and warned his members to be overly careful about the increasing rise in food poison that has been going on in the campus kitchen. Apparently there is a feud that has been going on for quite some time now between the faculty and kitchen staff. The kitchen wants an increase in payroll while the faculty is looking to downsize and possibly "exterminate" some of them. This does not sit well with the kitchen staff of course and so ergo the recent rise in food poison (a.k.a. a kitchen strike). The President vowed revenge on the kitchen crew and has reportedly (According to brother Benny that is) issued a command that has each shift cook run seventy suicides before the start of every shift and has all kitchen members doing a minimum of fifty push ups before every meal (twenty-five extra for every minute that a mean is late). Of course the kitchen crew has now vowed revenge on the GBS faculty and is promising to triple the amount of food poisons until further notice.

So, as a caring squirrel, I would kindly advise you students and future visitors to be rather leery when visiting the dinning hall in the future.

A Campus Squirrels Worst Nightmare

School is back in at GBS! For those of you who are not squirrels (and I'm presuming that this is the majority of you), I can only try to explain what great frustration this poses for me and Marie. Winter break was just becoming a routine and now this - Teachers, students, rude people who like to throw things at squirrels, and more rude people. I'll never forget the time last semester when me and Marie were hiding in the bushes just minding our own business when this rather untimely cup of orange juice rained down on us. It was from that point on that I came to this rather simple conclusion - all humans are quite evil and deserve to be bound, gagged, shot, and thrown into giant river. Oh yes and lest I forget the rather disgusting photo above, this goes double for our cat "friends" as well.

Oh, please don't get me wrong! I do not mean to come across as harsh or unloving; I am just what we squirrels call a practicalist.

It was the week after Christmas...

and all was peace, quiet, and beautiful. Ah, the old family members. Quite handy when it comes to the gift exchange department but most inconvenient when it comes to nieces and nephews. Okay, I get the whole "they're just excited that it's Christmas" line for a couple days. After all, I guess it is the highlight of the year for these little chaps. However, after about the fifth day in a row of "Its time to wake up Uncle Cambrian!" and the seventieth time of "We're going to beat you up Uncle Cambrian!" and the "Sorry we trashed your room Uncle Cambrian" line it tends to get a little old and I think my complaints are more then justified.
NOTE TO SELF: Ask for metal handcuffs and duct tape next Christmas. (Oh, and paintball gun)
Now I know some of you probably think of me as being a heartless tyrant (Marie included) but is it really my fault I got to be this way? I think not.

Peacefully Yours,
Cambrian

P.S. This would be Isaiah and his newest hobby (Maybe one of these days he will be knocked out and never regain consciousness - Hey, its okay to dream)